UK Parenting, Lifestyle & Beauty Blog. Mum to Darcy

Friday, 9 March 2018

Ways Our Parenting Styles Have Changed From Our Parents



Times have certainly changed especially in the way we parent our children. I had a pretty good childhood and I cannot thank my parents enough for everything they did for me, I was so lucky to be able to go on holiday too which is a luxury, it created so many amazing memories for me. I've learnt everything I know about being a parent from them and whilst I may not do everything that they did with me with Darcy, I respect that we all parent differently and adjust with the times. I found it really interesting to learn about what other bloggers thought about there parents parenting styles (wow i've said the word parenting alot) and what they wouldn't do with their children now.

My mum would always refuse to drive me anywhere growing up - I think she thought she was instilling independence in me - but actually it just meant I ended up in some questionable situations, really not worth it when all I wanted was to go to the cinema with my friends! - Kate

My parents didn’t give me pocket money until I was a teenager. I hated it as a 10-year-old watching my friends going into shops and being able to buy sweets. We gave our kids pocket money from a much earlier age - Pete

I don't pressure my child into thinking everything hinges on academic success. My parents were really strict and if I didn't get top grades or strive to be a lawyer or something 'professional' I felt like a failure and was letting them down. I encourage my daughter to do whatever makes her happy, explain that exam results are more for the schools benefit than hers and that as long as she does her best that is all we expect. - Alex
100% agree with this, I really felt this alot growing up too.

Hitting my kids. If I can't reason with them using words and teach them to behave well without physical threat, I'm not worthy to be a parent. - Irina

My mother rewarded me for being good with sweets (on a daily basis!) and although I understand why she did it, I do think it created an unhealthy relationship with food and sugar. I won't be using food as a reward personally and will be trying to avoid refined sugar and chocolates except on special occasions. - Christy

I was told to do stuff and never asked so for example 'jade your doing the washing up' rather than 'jade please could you do the washing up' I also never got pocket even when I did help out. The reason I was given was 'well you get money from babysitting' I was very independent as a way of how I was brought up which wasn't necessarily a bad thing but it did result in me getting married at 16 just to get away from home. - Jade


I would never tell my daughter she’s fat or chubby. It’s so damaging. My parents and grandparents have done it to me all my life and are still doing it to my younger sister. It’s wrong, every girl is beautiful and a young girl trying to work out life in the midst of tons of hormones shouldn’t be told that she’s anything but perfect. 
Now I have my own daughter, if anyone mentions her weight no matter how old she is, I’ll tell them that I feel it’s completely unacceptable and if they continue, I’d rather them not be in her life. She needs to grow up knowing that she’s perfect and shouldn’t change for anyone. - Bella


My parents were far too easy on me with their expectations about helping at home. I grew up not knowing how to do much for myself at all. I know they wanted me to have the loveliest childhood, but when I joined the army I had to learn to iron and it was so alien to me. My boys learn to do as much independently as they can, and have chores too. - Sara-Jayne
This was the same for me too, when I left home I had to learn everything from scratch as I just didn't know how to do anything for myself.

Limiting sweets and junk food. My family were quite strict on sweets and while we were allowed them, it wasn't very often. I grew up with an array of eating disorders and I'm sure this sort of limiting contributed to that. I have no rules surrounding sweets with my two and they rarely ask, are a healthy weight, etc. I don't want them growing up to think any foods are off limits. - Georgina

Comparing me and my siblings. In particular my mum would compare my sister and I in terms of our body shapes (we're very different to each other) and it led to me feeling insecure about my appearance. I want to teach our kids that everyone is different and to accept and love others how they are -Bridget


I found this really interesting, especially in the way we use these experiences to teach and parent our children, i'd be curious to know what our children say about us in years to come. I think being a parent is the hardest job in the world so knowing what is best to do doesn't come easy.
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4 comments

  1. I feel like my parenting style is completely different to my parents, they were massively strict with us, and that just isn't me at all. I have more of a gentle approach. Found this post really interesting to see everyone's different opinions and takes. x

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  2. Very interesting to see all the different experiences. I think I have a fairly similar parenting style to my parents but it's very different from my in-laws.

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  3. I found this so interesting, it's crazy how much our own parenting experiences transfer through into how we behave as parents ourselves.

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  4. So interesting - I’m completely different to my own parents, but my partner is completely different to me. It makes you wonder where our styles come from!

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